


Anchor

by Wagnetic



Category: The Eagle | The Eagle of the Ninth (2011)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, Fluff and Angst, Guilt, Light D/S overtones, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-14
Updated: 2013-06-14
Packaged: 2017-12-14 23:06:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 702
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/842414
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wagnetic/pseuds/Wagnetic
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Marcus's thoughts keep him awake, but Esca helps him to stop thinking.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Anchor

“I wish I had more to give you,” Marcus says. His voice is whisper-soft and muffled further by Esca’s hair against his lips. It’s normally Esca who has difficulty sleeping on warm summer nights, but a long day spent working with the horses has helped him on his way. It’s done nothing for Marcus, however. As pleasantly fatigued as he is, his mind won’t allow him the luxury of sleep. Marcus knows that Esca is happy with the life they’ve built together, but some nights the knowledge isn’t enough to inspire belief. After all, Esca still lives among Romans— the men who robbed him of his home and of his kin; the men who clipped his ear and cheered for his death in the arena. These men are Marcus’s people, and Marcus is not so different from them. He has been a soldier and he’s killed and conquered in the name of Rome. He tries to hold on to the fact that Esca has forgiven him for his past. He tries to believe that this means he can forgive himself as well. Some nights, however, it just isn’t enough.

“I wish I could give you back your family,” Marcus says. “I wish I could give you back your home.”

Still asleep, Esca shifts and lets out a little huff of breath, as though to chide Marcus for wallowing.

“Allow me my moment of weakness now and I’ll be strong again tomorrow.” Even now he is asking more of Esca and promising him nothing in return. “I’d give you anything, you know, but I don’t have much to offer.”

Esca shifts again and mumbles something into the base of Marcus’s throat. Then Marcus feels Esca’s eyelashes brush against his skin as Esca’s eyes open.

“What is it?” he asks drowsily.

“Nothing. I didn’t mean to wake you.”

Esca scoffs, but even that sound of derision is colored with affection. “I’m awake now, so tell me what’s troubling you and then we can both sleep.”

“I was just remembering,” Marcus says, holding onto Esca a little tighter now that he’s already woken him. “I wonder sometimes, how you can forgive me, and how what I can offer can be enough for you. If you hadn’t been content to settle here, you could have had a wife and children and a home beyond Roman territory. You couldn’t be with your own clan, I know, but you could have had a family. You—”

Esca wriggles out of his grasp and rolls them over, pinning Marcus’s wrists against the furs. “I’ve tried to tell you before, but perhaps I haven’t used the right words or you simply haven’t understood. You are my family. Sometimes I do miss my life before, and I will never forget my clan, but I would never be parted from you.”

Marcus stares up at him and doesn’t fight his hold, but his eyes are still guarded. “I know,” he sighs. Knowing doesn’t help this time.

“You know, but you don’t feel it. Feel this, then.” Esca bites the skin at Marcus’s collarbone, just hard enough to leave a mark and draw out a gasp. He grips Marcus’s wrists more tightly, presses down firmly. “You aren’t in the barracks or the battlefields, Marcus. You’re here, in the bed we share. I could leave at this moment if I chose to, but I’m here with you. I’m here because this is my home. You are my home, and I’m yours.”

Marcus lets out a breath and his eyes fall closed as he focuses on Esca’s words, the weight of him. Esca settles on top of him, warming Marcus with his skin. Marcus is pinned between the bed and Esca’s body, and both are strong and firm but soft to touch. There is nowhere for him to slip away, and so he remains anchored in this moment, just feeling and listening.

“I have you,” Esca says. “I’m here.”

“How do you always know what I need?”

Esca kisses him and nuzzles against his neck. “I don’t always, but I know you well enough to guess, just as you do when I’m in need of your care. Now sleep. I’ll still be here in the morning.”

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first minific for this fandom, so of course I end up writing it under the influence of my sleep meds. It's an unbeta'd little thing, so any errors are purely the result of my brain refusing to work properly. That said, I hope it makes an enjoyable read.


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